To Get Her, You Must First Get Yourself

Reading Nicole’s post got me to thinking. She seems so perfect and so cool. My pop culture-trained mind whispered “No, she’s hot and famous, I don’t deserve her”. The reality is that there’s no reason why I don’t. More importantly, is that the kind of woman I want? The only thing standing in the way of finding this particular brand of life partner is myself.

You may have found yourself thinking the same thing at some point. Let me give you some advice, brother to brother. If you have the privilege of knowing with no shadow of doubt what kind of woman you want, I congratulate you. Your target is set, you know what to shoot for. This is rare and is to be celebrated.

In the meantime, I’m expecting that you won’t be distracted by women you don’t want. And in the absence of that distraction, why not improve your own life? Why not invest in becoming the truest version of yourself? On becoming Maximum? Why not work on that, so that when your Nicole comes around she will say “ah yes, this is the James I’ve been looking for this whole time” and she will not be deceived.

Spoiler alert: if the James you truly are, and the James she’s looking for, are not the same, all is already lost. If, on the other hand, this Nicole your real Nicole, then the James she’s been looking for this whole time is the James you truly are. If you’re not him now, you should focus on becoming him, first and foremost.

Go be the James you truly are and if your Nicole is out there, she will find you.

And it’ll be great.